It’s My Birthday - OMG, I'm 40?!

It's happened. I'm 40 yrs old. Holy... How the hell did this happen? That means that 20 yrs ago, I was 20. That's half my age!!!

If only I could talk to that 20 yr old now, what would I tell her/me? What would I even had said to my 30 yr old self (that was just 10 yrs ago!)

There was still A LOT of growing up I had to do, life lessons to be learned. Experiences to be had, and mistakes that I needed to make. And, you are still learning, everyday.

And in honor of my turning the BIG 4-0, here's what I've learned thus far (if it sounds familiar, then you've probably either figured this out for yourself, or have had conversation about it with friends, or even read it somewhere). It seems as if ALL 40 yrs old are learning the same truths.


1. I've learned that the most important thing in life, business, and all else is to never compromise on your integrity.

2. I've learned that you must know what you need, and give it to yourself. Eat when you're hungry and sleep when you're tired. Listen to your body and good things happen to it.

3. I've learned that whatever you're afraid of, you must try that shit! The worst thing that's gonna happen is you're gonna fail. But that's worse than living with the regret of having never tried.

4. I've also learned that sometimes you have to take the leap of faith and build your wings on the way down.

5. I've learned that if I do the same thing, day in and day out, I become a zombie walker of this Earth, and not a "liver" of this Earth. Passion and happiness come from trying new things, venturing scarily into the unknown and pushing yourself to your own personal limits. Try the impossible.

6. I've learned that God doesn't give us what we want; He gives us what we need. Every time. It may not seem like it in the moment, but it's what we need to grow.

7. I learned the true meaning of life: BREATHE DEEPLY and appreciate the moment.

8. I've learned that it's ok to try bad things, just don't make a habit out of it.

9. I've learned that if you're great at something, play it up. All successful people play up their strengths. They don't minimize their talents.

10. I've learned it's always important to have fun and be silly. The funnier and sillier you are, the happier you'll be.

11. I've learned not to take no for an answer. Also, if I say NO, I have to mean it and stick to it.

12. I've learned that every time you state what you want, you're the first to hear it. It's a message to you and others about what you think is possible. Thanks Oprah.

13. I've learned that marriage is not for me. Its okay to be 40 and still single. It doesn't mean there is something wrong with you.

14. I learned that a great massage, a great glass of wine, a great song and a great workout are a few of life's greatest treats. And great sex doesn't hurt either.

15. I've learned that success comes at a cost -- there is no free lunch.

16. I've learned that self-esteem and confidence are not bad words. They're important words. It takes a lot of work to get there, but it's the foundation to thriving.

17. I've learned not to spend next week's paycheck (Thanks Mom).

18. I've learned to always face the music, no matter how dark it may sound.

19. I've learned that family comes first. Period. No exceptions to the rule.

20. I've learned that sometimes you win. Sometimes you learn.

21. I've learned that music is often the perfect solution to a bad mood.

22. I've learned that I'm selfish and not being a mom or having kids does not diminish my femininity or who I am as a woman. Some woman are born to be mothers, some are thrust into the role.

23. I've learned that friendship is invaluable. If you've had the same friends for more than 15 yrs, TREASURE THEM.

24. I've learned you can't just live off the fat of the land. It's crucial to give back. Give back in any way you can -- just give what you can and much more will be received.

25. I've learned that change, while scary, is necessary to grow.

26. I've learned that we often don't do that particular good thing for ourselves when we actually need it the most; but gently pushing ourselves especially when we feel most depleted is often the key to better health and well-being.

27. I've learned that inspiration comes in the rarest of forms.

28. I've learned to LOVE the HATERS. Naysayers, doubters, haters - their words can hurt us, haunt us and tickle our insecurities. The important thing in life, is to take from it, learn from it, but not let it stop you. Haters and doubters often make us want to quit or even question our entire life plan. Work hard and prove them wrong. Success comes from doing what you love, and working at it daily. Listen to the critics, but follow your heart. Trust your instincts.

29. As I told you above (see #11), I've learned never to take no for an answer, but then again, I've learned: Don't beat a dead horse. The key is to know when to walk away.

30. I've learned to always give 100 percent. Give more whenever possible.

31. I've learned that I have a love affair with music and food. If my hearing goes early in life, it will be worth it. And if I put on five more pounds, but ate everything I loved, and that's just fine with me. Life is about doing what you love.

32. I've learned that sometimes we find our purpose on purpose, and sometimes our purpose finds us by accident. The importance is to explore it once you know.

33. I've learned that life is too short to put up with bullshit.

34. I've learned that when someone goes out on a limb and shows you their vulnerable side, encourage them and praise their authenticity. You have no idea how hard it may have been for them to show you.

35. I've learned we all have to be accountable for our own actions. It's easiest to blame others and not take personal responsibility for our own actions.

36. I've learned that we should plan but always leave room for the unexpected. Sometimes it's the unplanned that bears the best fruit.

37. I've learned that time spent doing nothing is never wasted if you enjoyed it, relaxed and smiled.

38. I've learned that being a "secretive" or "private" person, never sharing details about yourself or your life at the risk of looking vulnerable, weak or imperfect to others comes down to self-esteem and can hold us back in life. When you can be forthright and honest about your situation, sharing your story in the hopes of helping others, it in turn helps yourself and the world opens up for you.

39. I've learned that honesty is the main foundation for trust; without one, you can NEVER have the other.

40. I've learned that life is short, it ain't no dress rehearsal and you've gotta WAKE UP to your life, or you could miss it.